Husband and wife were in the midst of a violent quarrel, and hubby was
losing his temper. "Be careful," he said to his wife. "You will bring out
the animal in me."...



"So what?" his wife shot back. "Who is afraid of a mouse?
**********************************************************************The girl was supposed to write a short story in as few words as possible
for her college class and the instructions were that it had to discuss Religion, Sexuality and Mystery.

She was the only one who received
an A+ and this is what she wrote:


Good God, I'm pregnant. I wonder who did it?
************************************************************************Bihar Bihar Istate Gorment
Driving License Sekson
Traaphic Dipartment

DRIVING LICEN APPLIKASON PHAAROM
-----------------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Pleej do not shoot the person at the applikason kounter. He will give you the licen.

For phurthar instructions, see bottom applikason.

1. Last name:
(_) Yadav (_) Sinha (_) Pandey (_) Misra (_) Dont no (Check karet box)

2. First name:
(_) Ramprasad (_) Lakhan (_) Sivprasad (_) Jamnaprasad (_) Dont no (Check karet box)

3. Age:
(_) Less than phipty (_) Greater than phipty (_) Dont no (Check karet box)

4. Sex:
____ Male _____ Phimale_____ not sure _____not applicable

5. Chappal Size:
____ Lepht ____ Right

6.Occupason:
(_) Politison (_) Doodhwala (_) Pehelwaan (_) House wife (_)Un-employed (Check karet box)

7. Number of children libing in the household: ___

8. Number of children that are yours: ___

9. Mather name: _______________________

10. Phather Name: ____________________ (If not noun,leave blank)

11. Ejjucason: Class- 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

12. Dental rekard/color: (_) Ellow (_) Berownish-ellow (_) Berown (_) Belack (_) Other color _______ pleej Give egjhakt color(Check karet box)

13.Your thumb imparesson :
____________________________

IMPORTANT INSTRUCTIONS:

1. If you are copying from another applikason pharom, pleej do not copy thumb impression also. Pleej provide your own thumb imparesson.

2. PLEEJ DO NOT USE PHINGERS OF YOUR LEGS

3. Use thumb on your lepht hand only. If you dont have lepht hand, use your thumb on right hand. If you do not have right hand, use thumb on lepht hand.

4. IF YOU DONT HAVE BOTH HANDS, YOU CANNOT DRIVE. WE ARE VARY ISTRICT ABOUT THIS.

...

...

Guess, what
some more:

Grandpa and granddaughter were sitting talking when she asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?"
"Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered.
A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me too?"
"Yes, He did," the older man answered.
For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what was running through her mind.
At last she spoke up. "You know, Grandpa," she said, "God is doing a lot better job lately."

********************************************************************

The composition teacher asked the class to write about an unusual event that happened during the past week. Little Johnny got up and read his essay.
It began, "Daddy fell into the well last week..."
"My goodness!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he all right?"
"He must be," said the boy. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday

**********************************************************************

One day a 6 year old girl was sitting in the classroom. The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children.
The teacher asked a little boy: Sonu do you see the tree outside?
Sonu: Yes.
Teacher: Tommy, do you see the grass outside?
Sonu: Yes.
Teacher: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky.
Sonu: OK. (He returned a few minutes later) Yes, I saw the sky.
Teacher: Did you see God?
Sonu: No.
Teacher: That`s my point. We can`t see God because he isn`t there. He doesn`t exist.
A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions.
The teacher agreed and the little girl asked the boy: Do you see the tree outside?
Sonu: Yes.
Little girl: Tommy do you see the grass outside?
Sonu: Yessssss (getting tired of the questions by this time)
Little girl: Did you see the sky?
Sonu: Yessssss
Little Girl: Tommy, do you see the teacher?
Sonu: Yes
Little Girl: Do you see her brain?
Sonu: No
Little Girl: Does that mean she doesn`t have one?

***************************************************************
A three-year-old walked up to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctor's office.

He inquisitively asked the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?"

She replied, "I'm having a baby."

With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?"

She answered, "He sure is."

Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?"

She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby."

With an even more surprised and shocked look he asked, "Then why did you eat him?"

****************************************************************

One day Gramma sent her grandson little Johnnie down to the water hole to get some water to cook dinner.
As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Gramma's kitchen.
"Well now, where's my bucket and where's my water?" Gramma asked him.
"I can't get any water from that water hole, Gramma" exclaimed Johnnie. "There's a BIG ol' alligator down there!"
"Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnnie. He's been there for a few years now, and he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!"
"Well, Gramma," replied Johnnie, "if he's as scared as I am, then that water ain't fit to drink!"



Have a great day guys.

A duel was fought between Alexander Shott and John Nott. Nott was shot
and Shott was not. In this case it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some
said that Nott was not shot. But Shott says that he shot Nott.

It may be that the shot Shott shot, shot Nott, or it may be possible
that the shot Shott shot, shot Shott himself. We think, however, that
the shot Shott shot, shot not Shott, but Nott. Anyway, it is hard to
tell which was shot and which was not.

With an even more surprised and shocked look he asked, "Then why did you eat him?" ................>>>>>LOL


good day:)
enjoy
ruIna

God was in the process of creating the universe. And he was
> explaining his subordinates .....
> "Look everything should be in balance. For example, after every
> 10 deers there should be a lion.
> Look here my fellow angels, here is the country of the United
> States. I have blessed them with prosperity and money. But at the
> same time I have given them insecurity and tension....
> And here is Africa. I have given them beautiful nature. But at
> the same time, I have given them climatic
> extremes....
> And here is South America. I have given them lots of forests.
> But at the same time, I have given them lesser
> land so that they would have to cut off the forests...
> So you see fellows, everything should be in balance.
> One of the angels asked... "God, what is this extremely
> beautiful country here?"
> God said....... "Ah! ah...that is the crown piece of all.
> "NEPAL", my most precious creation.
> It has understanding and friendly people. Sparkling streams,
> serene mountains.
> A culture which speaks of the great tradition that they live.
> people with a heart of gold.....
> The angel was quite surprised "But god you said everything
> should be in balance."
> God replied - "Look at the neighbors, I gave them."

tf] tf xf]

Some more new jokes. Kya. Aaja school ma basda basda dikka laagera, yehi padhera baseko, kya.

A mailman walked down the street and saw Little Johnny playing in a pile of shit, had it between his fingers and smeared over his body.

The mailman asked him what he was doing and Johnny looked up and said, "Making a Mailman".

This pissed the mailman off, he went up the street and saw a fireman. He told the fireman what the boy was doing and what a smart ass the kid was, the fireman said that he would have a talk with the boy.

The fireman walked up to Little Johnny and asked him what was he doing playing in pile of shit, Johhny looked up and said, "Making a Fireman."

This pissed the fireman off, he left to tell a cop. The cop said that he would have a talk with the boy. The cop asked Little Johnny, "What are you doing, playing with a pile of shit?"

Little Johnny looked up and said nothing.

The cop said, "You told the mailman and the fireman that you were making a fireman and a mailman, why don't you tell me that you are making a cop."

Little Johnny looked up and without a grin said, "I ain't got enough shit".-

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls Royce to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5,000. The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral.
"Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce", the man said.
The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank`s underground parking for safekeeping, and gave him $5,000. Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank`s doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back.
"That will be $5,000 in principal, and $15.40 in interest", the loan officer said.
The man wrote out a check and started to walk away.
"Wait sir", the loan officer said, "while you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow $5,000?"
The man smiled. "Where else could I park my Rolls-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $15.40?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared.
"Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success," he cackled. "I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now."
The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime.
"Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk."
___________________________________________________________________

Some more :

Laloo Yadav s car is driving along a backcountry road on the way back to Patna, when all of a sudden a piglet jumps out in front of the car. The piglet dies on the spot. Laloo, upset, tells the chauffeur to go find the owner of the piglet so that he can pay the damages. The driver is gone for two hours and when he comes back, he has a bag full of money, and a wondering look on his face. Laloo wants to know what happened.
The driver tells him "Hum jab gaanv me pahuncha to dekha kuchh log ped ke niche baithe hain. Jub hum unko bataya ki kya hua hai, tab sare log jama ho gaye. Humko laga ki aaj to hamari pitayee hogee. Par hum dekha ki sare log paisa jama kar rahe hain. Hum socha ki ye sara piasa wo janvar ke malik ke liye hai. Par un logo ne saara paisa hamein de diya."
Laloo says "Sasoor ka natee, Theek theek batao. Tum unko kya bola tha?"
The driver replies "Hum kaha ki hum Laloo Yadav ka driver hoon aur hum sooar ka bachcha ko maar diya hoon
____________________________________________________________
Passengers on a plane are waiting for the flight to leave. The entrance opens, and two men walk up the aisle, dressed in pilot uniforms. Both are wearing dark glasses. One is using a seeing-eye dog, and the other is tapping his way up the aisle with a cane.

Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start. The passengers begin glancing nervously, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming.

The plane moves faster and faster down the runway, and people at the windows realize that they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport.

As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off, that it will plow into the water, screams of panic fill the cabin. But at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.

Up in the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Joe, one of these days, they're going to scream too late, and we're all gonna die."
__________________________________________________________________

Late one Sunday afternoon, a blonde from a small town was taking a long walk through a nearby meadow when she was surprised to see a parachutist trapped in the high branches of a tree.

"Hellllllp!" he cried when he spotted her down below.

"What are you doing up there?" she called back.

"I was skydiving," he answered, "and my parachute didn't open!"

The blonde rolled her eyes. "Well, of course it didn't. If you'd just asked one of the locals, anybody could've told you that *nothing* around here opens on a Sunday!"
________________________________________________________________
A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mum, what's sex?"

His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject.

When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school and said, "Yes, but how am I going to get all that into this one little square?
___________________________________________________________________
One day Gramma sent her grandson little Johnnie down to the water hole to get some water to cook dinner.
As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Gramma's kitchen.
"Well now, where's my bucket and where's my water?" Gramma asked him.
"I can't get any water from that water hole, Gramma" exclaimed Johnnie. "There's a BIG ol' alligator down there!"
"Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnnie. He's been there for a few years now, and he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!"
"Well, Gramma," replied Johnnie, "if he's as scared as I am, then that water ain't fit to drink!"
_____________________________________________________________

AND LAST ONE FOR TODAY
**********************
A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"

First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue."

The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can sometimes be gray, or black."
A second little boy says, "Trees are definitely green."

"Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown."

Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?"

The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!!!"

"OK...then I DEFINITELY shit my pants!"

*********************************************************

Now its time for me to go to class (very unusual) and sit at the last bench (pretty much usual) and sleep (very very much usual).

Nothing new hapening today.

All of u have a nice day sleeping in the class kya.

harkeDai

The driver replies "Hum kaha ki hum Laloo Yadav ka driver hoon aur hum sooar ka bachcha ko maar diya hoon...............>>>hehehe

harkey dai;
u are repeating jokes k...
tyahi pani haso chai uthyo:)

mero taa no class aja morning ma:)
hmm ohki noe fun tyme
***********************************************
Jackie Chan ki saas ka naam kya hai?..






nahi paata??















Answer: D'Cold

How ?? Cha(i)n ki saans - D'cold !














chalo ab batao...
Jackie Chan ki bahu ka naam kya hai ?
















this is quite simple..

****************************************************************
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: - - - - silence - - - -
HUSBAND: "SH*T"
**************************************************************************




A chicken and an egg are lying in bed.
The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face.
The egg, looking a bit pissed off, grabs the sheet and rolls over and says "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question."

***************************************************************************

Santa Singh ji the english lecturer

Sardar Santa Singh ji is the english teacher in a school. He is very well renowned for all his students do very well in exams.

The school is having an inspection and the inspector decided to visit the english class. This is what transpires :

Santa Singh : " Bolo bachon GADHA "
Students (in chorous) : "GADHA "

Santa Singh : " Bolo bachon GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA "
Students (in chorous) : "GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA "

Santa Singh : " Bolo bachon GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MAI "
Students (in chorous) : "GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA , GADHE KE
PECHE MAI"

Santa Singh : " Bolo bachon GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MAI AUR MERE PECHE SAARA DESH "
Students (in chorous) : "GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA , GADHE KE
PECHE MAI AUR MERE PECHE SAARA DESH"

By this time the inspector is furious . He confronts the principal and shouts at him "What is this Santa Singh teaching to students. He is supposed to be taking an english class and what he is saying is GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE GADHA , GADHE KE PECHE MAI AUR MERE PECHE SAARA DESH .

The principle too is shocked , Santa Singh the famous english teacher doing this. He immediately sends for for Santa Singh.

Principal : " Santa singh ji what nonsense are you telling these students, GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MAI AUR MERE
PECHE SAARA DESH ".
Santa Singh : " Yes i was telling all this in class, but i was only teaching the students the spellings of ASSASSINATION(ASS-ASS-I-NATION) . "






















Answer: D'Cold again !!!

Why ?? Kyunki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi !!!!

aiight bhayo aba dherai hasnu ani hasaunu hunna
have to study now:(



enjoy!


I cannot hide this from u any more. I don't want 2 hurt u and I feel
it's best if I tell u, before you hear it from someone else
............ Potato Prices Have Gone Up !

*************************

Could u fax me ur photo very very urgently ? Mind u it's really very
very urgent, damn serious and very imp ..... I'm playing cards and
we've misplaced the JOKER.

************************
Good looks catch the eyes but Good Personality catches the heart,
You are blessed with both!. FLATTERED?. Don't Be, it was sent to me,
I just wanted you to read it.

*************************
Good morning...Have u done two of the most important things when you
wakeuptoda y?
1)Pray, so that u may live...
2)Take a bath-so that others may live too!

*************************
Can u pronounce good english:- read along woof, roof, loof, shoof,
shoof,woof, loof, roof, poof, woof woof, hoof, woof, roof,
shoof. Test --- results below














results: U r a good dog. Now stop barking.

*************************
I saw something in a shop window. It was stunning, cute, simply
adorable. I was supposed 2 buy it 4 u, then I realised it was my
reflection.

*************************
To live a life, one needs brains, reflex, perception, looks, IQ,
knowledge,way of ___expression & many more mental
qualities. Hats off 2 u coz u manage 2 live without them.

*************************
Falling in love is a sweet ambition, finding true love is a life
time mission.. Take my word, follow the Indian tradition &
marry ur dad's ugly decision.

*************************
1 day u'll B srprisd 2C ME beside U. U & ME laughing, U & ME crying,
U & ME dreaming, U & ME holding on, U & ME... just U & ME sitting in
a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U.

*************************
Maine puchha chand se "dekha hai kahin mere yaar sa hasin",
chand ne kaha "saale itni upar se dikhta hai kya".

*************************
If u save this msg, it means I'm cute. If u edit this, I'm still
cute. If u fwd this, u r spreading that i'm cute & if u erase
this, u r jealous of me coz i'm cute!

I hav som......harke daju...tapai lai jhau lagyo bhane ko hoina? here...read this. library ma kai kaam chyina...yai joke khojera basyo ;) aajkaal ta phadnu pani...maan lagdai na.....kina kina :( lop sop pare ko pani...chyina....

anywayz....i was suppose to do a research on nerves.(bio) ..tara end up ------------->

Sardar : Yaar meri biwi mere dost ke sath bhaag gayi
Man : Uski yaad aati hogi naa
Sardaar : Haa yaar.. bahut acha dost tha

*********************
A sardar got himself a puzzle game. It took him 1 hard year 2 finish it.
He was so proud of himself bcoz on the side of the box it said 2-3 yrs.

***********************

A sardar was urinating besides a car. A foreigner said to him "Aapke Yahan Police Nahin Pakadti".
He replied "Nahin Hamaare yahan khud pakadna padta hai!"

***********************

sardars' quote:

2 love is a devotion,
2 b loved is a sucess,
2 b with some 1 u love is an achievement,
2 b with some 1 who loves u is LIFE :)

*****************
Smart Man + Smart Nari = Flirting Jaari
Idiot Man + Smart Nari = Jeb Khai
Smart Man + Idiot Nari = Pav Bhari
Idiot Man + Idiot Nari = Shaadi

****************
Its really hard to wait for the right person.. especially when the wrong ones are so sexy.. !

*****************

Santa on cycle hit lady accidently, lady says break nahi mar sakta tha?
Santa : Break ka kya hain poori cycle to mar di..

*************

A small boy wrote to Santa : "Send me a brother"
Santa : "Send me your mother"

****************

Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth.... WHY?

Because his doctor advised him, aaj light hie khana!!

*****************

2 men, looking 4 their lost wives.
1st: What urs look like ?
2nd: She is 5'9, 36-24-36, fair, pretty & urs ?
1st: forget mine, lets look for urs!

******************
If vivek marries Aishwariya and becomes a "joru ka gulam" what will he be called?

*answer below....but dont scroll now, 1st think, if u hav some brain like sardar ji has ;)*

*******************
What is a similarity between mobile and marriage?

"Kash thode din aur ruk jaata to achha model mil jaata"

**************************
ans: Vivek-Obey-Rai !!!

*******************
Jasmeet Kaur caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room.

Jasmeet: 'What are you searching for?'

Santa: 'Hidden cameras!'

Jasmeet: 'And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?'

Santa: 'That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying 'You are watching MTV! How does he know that?'

*******************
santa ji : My wife's an angel
banta ji : You're lucky. Mine's still alive!

***************

sardar ji to his fren, jasbindar singh:

yar, I mix RUM with WATER I feel drunk,
I mix GIN with WATER I feel drunk,
I mix WHISKEY with WATER then also feel drunk,
I swear aaj ke baad I'll never drink WATER.

*************************

Teacher : U know importance of periods?
Johnny: Ya, once my sister missed one, my mom fainted, dad got an attack, our neighbor committed sucide.

*********************

yeti ho yar....bell pani lagyo....
wakka dikka lagney... :s

aaba...dherai hasyo...aaba runu parcha


pease ;ut

REAL technical NIGHTMARES...

Tech Support: What is your User Name?

Customer: John Smith.

Tech Support: (searching for user name johnsmith to no avail) that's your user name, your login? The one your account uses?

Customer: Yep.

Tech Support: So, John Smith is the user name for your account?


Customer: Yep.

Tech Support: .. (search for customer account by last name, find a million Smiths.. finally finds account.) We have your user name listed as "wolf231".

Customer: Yep.

Tech Support: Not John Smith.

Customer: Yep.

Tech Support: ...


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tech Support: What error message are you getting?

Customer: I'm not getting an error, it just won't connect.


Tech Support: Nothing comes up when you try to connect?

Customer: Nope, nothing happens at all. It doesn't say anything.

Tech Support: .. and nothing appears on the screen whatsoever?

Customer: Nope.

Tech Support: Well.. What happens to lead you to believe that it isn't working?

Customer: It says Error 691, User Name or Password ...


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.

Tech Support: Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager."

Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."


Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob."

Customer: "What do you mean?"

Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."

Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tech Support: I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.

Customer: Ok.

Tech Support: Did you get a pop-up menu?

Customer: No.

Tech Support: Ok. Right-click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?

Customer: Not at all.


Tech Support: Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?

Customer: Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote down 'click'

Tech Support: Ok, did you type 'click' with the keyboard?

Customer: Yes. Oh man! I've done something stupid, huh?

i think this a good one:

Bantu returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father." Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?"
"No son, that's because you are intelligent. "

Bantu seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am Sardar ??"

"No son, that's because you are intelligent," replies his father.

Happy with the answer, Bantu poses another question to his father, "Dad, today we had Medical Examination, all the other boys were shorter than me, I was atleast twice their height. Is that because I am Sardar ??"

The father replies, "No son, that's because you are 31 years old."


soruce: google jindabad ;)

pease ;ut

u are repeating jokes k... >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
ooooooooooooooooooops sorry hai ruIna jee. :0( :0(:0(:0(:0(:0(:0(:0( Yaad nai hudaina kya. Teti post garda ta lab ma basera eklai haasdai thiye. Sathi haru chai k k na bhayo bhanera herna aako kya. kina hasyo bhanera. Lol


Ruina yours second posting was just awesome. Thank god I was not in school nabhey eklai haasera jatra huntyo. Dheyt............................

Dherai haasnu hunna re. Hamro maamu le bhannu bhako, kya.

hehehehehehehehe

harkeDai

dont hav anything to do??? phadnu jhau lagyo bhane....yo joke phadnu....eek daam phadney taagat aaucha re ;)

Jasbindir singh: What are you looking at?
Beppo Singh: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.
Jasbindir singh: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Beppo Singh: four asterisks!

*****************

Lotta Singh: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs. because of a power failure.
Beppo Singh: Thats alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.

********************

A Sardarji, stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!"
"Yes, sir?"
"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"
"What was wrong with it?"
"It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!"
The librarian nodded and said, "Ah. So you must be the person who took our phone book."

*********************

Santa Singh was traveling in a crowded bus. He was carrying the passport size photograph of his son (for college admission). Accidentally, the photograph fell down from his pocket.
When Santa tried to pick it up the photograph slipped under a woman's saree. He asked her "Can you lift that saree? I wanna take a photograph"

The rest is history.

He was beaten so badly that he had to be admitted to hospital.

He was surprised to see Banta Singh on the bed next to him, in a worse condition. Banta explained what happened to him He had gone to a remote village to work. He finished late and missed the last bus. He couldn't find any hotel.

So he approached a nearby house and asked the Owner whether he can stay there for the night. The Owner replied" I have 2 grown up daughters. Sorry, I can't allow you to stay".

He approached the next house and asked whether he can stay there for the night. The Owner replied," I have 3 grown up daughters. Sorry,I can't allow you to stay".

He went to the next house and asked:" Do you have "grown up" Daughters?".

The Owner asked," WHY?????????"

Banta replied," I wanted to stay here for a night....."

************************

After having resigned as the CM of Bihar, Laloo decides to go modeling.
Once he enters the herd of buffaloes and resting his elbows on the back of the cattle he poses for the photo.
Next day the photo appears front page of a newspaper.

GUESS THE CAPTION!
"Laloo, third from left!"

*************************

At a bar in New York, the man to Laloo's left tells the bartender, "JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE."
And the man's companion says, "JACK DANIELS, SINGLE."
The bartender approaches Laloo and asks, "AND YOU, SIR?"
Laloo replies: "LALOO YADAV, MARRIED."

*******************

Laloos family planning policy.

"DONT HAVE MORE THAN TWO CHILDREN IN ONE YEAR"

**********************

Once Laloo wanted to know the time difference between Bihar and Las Vegas's, he called up the Tourist department and asked them "Ji..Could you tell me the time difference between Patna and Las Begas...".

The man at the other end replies "One second sir..." and Laloo immediately replies "Thank You!" and puts the phone down.

***************

Once Laloo was coming out of Airport. As there was huge rush the security guard told Laloo "WAIT PLEASE"

For which Laloo replied "65Kgs" and moved on...

******************

All the police organizations in the world are called to meet at a common place to evaluate the best organization. Only major organizations like the New York Police, the Melbourne Police, Scotland Yard, the Dutch Police and theBihar Police pass the eliminations round.

Now the task is to select the best one among them. Surprisingly, all the 5 groups do equally well in all the events so the judges put in a last (tiebreak) event to select the best team. They set a tiger free into a nearby forest and the team that catches the tiger in the least amount of time is to be declared the winner.

First the Dutch Police go into the jungle and catch the tiger in 30 minutes. Next the Melbourne Police go and return in 20 min. with the tiger. After this the New York police go and catch the tiger in 15 min. Next Scotland Yard detectives go in and catch the tiger in a mere 10 min. The Bihari Police have the the last slot. The tiger is released and the Mumbai Police start chasing it. 10 min go by.......20 min go by......30 min go by....1 hour passes by....3 hours pass by.

The judges get vexed and decide to go into the jungle in search of the Bihar Police. In a short time after getting into the jungle, they are amazed to find a big BEAR tied to a tree trunk, being hit left and right by the Bihar Police,who are shouting, 'BOL TU SHER HAI ........... SALE BOL ! TU SHER HAI !'

******************

Why does a sardar only change his baby's diapers once a month?

Because it says right on the box "good for up to 20 pounds."

*****************

A sardar's response to the comment, "THINK about it!":

"I don't have to think-I'm sardar!"

*****************

A sardar was recently hired at an office. His first task was to go out for coffee.

Eager to do well on the first day on the job, he grabbed a large thismos and hurried to a nearby coffee shop.

He held up the thismos and the coffee shop worker quickly came over to take his order.

"Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?" the sardar asked.

The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a few seconds, then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me."

"Oh good!" the sardar sighed in relief.

"Then give me two regular, two black, and two decaf.

***************************

A Sardarji father gave the following advice to his son about to be married.

"Son, if you want things from your in-laws, be sure to pitch your demand high. If you wanted a cycle, ask for a scooter; if you wanted a motorcycle, ask for a Maruti 800. Always ask for something higher than you need."

The young Sardarji who wanted no dowry, imbibed the lesson. When his father-in-law asked what he wanted, the young Sardarji replied, "nothing just Give me the girl's mother."
***************

bhyio...dherai hase yo.....pheri hasda hasda...pheet nai...phutla :P ...aani pheri sabai jana, malai SU garney hola :s

;)......pease out

Dherai haasnu hunna re. Hamro maamu le bhannu bhako, kya.

hehehehehehehehe

harkeDai .......................................>>>.>>LOL


nahasnu na ta hehhehehheehhehe(u haseko imagine gardaii hasdai baseko ma)

no_way;
i hav som......harke daju...tapai lai jhau lagyo bhane ko hoina? here...read this. library ma kai kaam chyina...yai joke khojera basyo ;) aajkaal ta phadnu pani...maan lagdai na.....kina kina :( lop sop pare ko pani...chyina.......................>>>>>>>>>>

no_way ................no way u can cheat meh.....anyway tyaso bhayee lop sop naparera holaa hai harkey dai no_way lai padhnu man nalageko?:P


keep them coming....hmm ma pani khojdai chu jokes haru:)

?no_way ................no way u can cheat meh.....anyway tyaso bhayee lop sop naparera holaa hai harkey dai no_way lai padhnu man nalageko?:P? ruina said

hoina?.timi ley?k bhannu khoje ko?.mero ta bheja ma kai pani cherey na. Aali?kura ghuma ra?na bhana yar?.ma ta sojo kura matra bhuj-chu. ;)

anywayz?ma pani jokes haru khojdai chu?..ruinaji how about some jpt jokes in ur thread? ?.ramailo huncha ne hai?.some some grl, gets offended by those jpt joke?.i m sure u don?t fall under that list. :p
la?ma pani jokes haru khojdai chu?yar school ko library ma testo webpage nai block cha?.kyaaaaaaaaaaaaa ryaaaaaaaaaaaag bhyio L ghar ?.janu paryo..aani ;)

la?.ta?.jai Nepal.

waiting for ur jokes, harke daju, timi ruina pani ;)

aani...harkedaju....mero aauta kaam garnu bhane ko...khai *i'm still waiting*
pease ;ut

hyaa kehi pani hoina
maile tyatikkai jiskako nii. hehe

ani kahile je bhanchau kahile ruina bhanchau k ho au??bujdaina ma taysto bango tedo kura hehe.ruina bhanda huncha..afterall sabai jana school padhai raicha..friends ni.:)

how about some jpt jokes in ur thread? ?.ramailo huncha ne hai?.some some grl, gets offended by those jpt joke?.i m sure u don?t fall under that list. :p............>>>>>>>
san le block gardinu huncha ani khuching parcha ....pardaina yaha jpt jokes lekhnu afai padhai basa.....lop sop naparee pani kina padha man lageena bhanchau bhaneko taa grrrrr taystaii jpt joke padha raicha ani kaha bata padhnu man lagcha ....


*************************************************************************


hmm now phun tyme!!

Once upon a time four guys an American,a French,a Lebanese and a Chinese went up to the mountains to test how an echo sounds like.

After taking a deep breath, the American shouted "Hello the echo replied...hello...hello".
Then the French shouted Salut the echo replied Salut....Salut.....Salut
The lebanese shouted Marhaba,the echo replied Marhaba...Marhaba....Marhaba
Finally the Chinese shouted Ching Fwan Swou and the echo replied SAY WHAT?

****************************************************************************


Aaj Tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a train accident at
Amritsar station. Only one sardar left alive.

The correspondent goes to him and asks, "Sardarji how did it happen?"
Sardar: "Oh ji pucho mat. sab kuch sahi tha sab log platform par khade gaadi
ki wait kar rahe they. Achanak announcement hui ki shatabdee express 2 no.
platform par aa rahi hai. Jaise hi sab ne suna ki gaddi PLATFORM PAR aa rahi
hai, sab log apni jaan bachane ke liye patri par kood gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi
patri par aa gayi."

Aaj tak: "Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap patri par nahin koode."

Sardar: "oe nahin ji main to suicide karne ke liye patri par hi leta
tha.Jaise hi announcement hui main to platform par chad gaya."


*******************************************************************************


A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a
question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit
a bus, went upon the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop
window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver
said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights
out of me!"
The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little
tap would scare you so much."
The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my
first day as a cab driver - I've been driving a van carrying dead
bodies for the last 25 years."

********************************************************************************

Sardarji zebra crossing ke black & white patte par
bar idhar-udhar chalte the, woh kya soch rahe
honge....think.............
"SALA YE PIANO BAJTA KYO NAHI"



enjoy!ani happy new year

RuIna Jee,

Maine puchha chand se "dekha hai kahin mere yaar sa hasin",
chand ne kaha "saale itni upar se dikhta hai kya".
===============================

Dami lagyo.... kaam ma eklai hasda hasda aashu nai aayo yo padera ta..... You made my day....New Years eve ma yesto haseko ... hope i will be able to laugh coming year as well.

Anyway Happy New Year to you and all of my other sajhabasi harulai.

wiz